Today I had a not-so-mommy moment.
While nursing, Baby engaged both full erupted teeth and then whipped her head back. You know how they dub loud opera music over a sitcom character when they go a cussing rampage? Unfortunately, there is no budget for a soundtrack to Mrs. Shakes' Crazy Adventure, so those words crisply burst through the silence--and they just kept coming. I said things I'm not proud of. I said things I wish had been auto corrected.
Baby's mouth fell open. We both just stared at each other for a while, me trying to remember what I just said, her wondering what on earth kind of game that was.
She smiled. I picked her up and plopped her across the bed. I needed a safe distance to assess the damage without her trying to vacuum seal her way back on.
Luckily, everything was still attached, and she had been winding down anyway. I kissed her on the cheek and sweetly explained that she should avoid doing that again because I didn't want to accidentally shot put her across the room.
Too bad we can't get a snap shot of that moment for a Breastfeeding with Realistic Expectations Campaign. Something like "Breast is Best (if you're able), but it's not always Beautiful," sponsored by Nipples.
Nipples: out there taking on friendly fire simply because teeth are assholes.
Hey, "Teeth are Assholes" sounds like an excellent sister campaign. I don't think we'd have to do much work to drum up support for that one.
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