Thursday, September 26, 2013

The Bite Heard 'Round the World

Today I had a not-so-mommy moment. 

While nursing, Baby engaged both full erupted teeth and then whipped her head back.  You know how they dub loud opera music over a sitcom character when they go a cussing rampage?  Unfortunately, there is no budget for a soundtrack to Mrs. Shakes' Crazy Adventure, so those words crisply burst through the silence--and they just kept coming. I said things I'm not proud of. I said things I wish had been auto corrected.

Baby's mouth fell open.  We both just stared at each other for a while, me trying to remember what I just said, her wondering what on earth kind of game that was.  

She smiled.  I picked her up and plopped her across the bed.  I needed a safe distance to assess the damage without her trying to vacuum seal her way back on. 

Luckily, everything was still attached, and she had been winding down anyway.  I kissed her on the cheek and sweetly explained that she should avoid doing that again because I didn't want to accidentally shot put her across the room.

Too bad we can't get a snap shot of that moment for a Breastfeeding with Realistic Expectations Campaign.  Something like "Breast is Best (if you're able), but it's not always Beautiful," sponsored by Nipples.  
Nipples: out there taking on friendly fire simply because teeth are assholes.  

Hey, "Teeth are Assholes" sounds like an excellent sister campaign.  I don't think we'd have to do much work to drum up support for that one.

No comments:

Post a Comment